With the likes of Jesse Ventura publishing his theory that Nearly Everything is a Conspiracy, I’ve about decided there is a huge one hidden within my dryer. I suspect the apparel-appliance-industrial complex is behind it, or maybe even Google, who knows what those folks are up to these days! The thing is: I only buy black mens’ socks. Just basic black, not dark blue, not gray, not charcoal, not brown, just black. And yet everytime I go to sort and pair my socks fresh from the dryer, I can only find mates for about half of them!
I’m not colorblind. I don’t use bleach. I’m pretty sure nobody else is sneaking into my house and using my laundry facilities, or swapping out my all-black socks for some grayish or brownish ones. But now I have all these single socks. Some more blue or gray or brown than any of the others, one with red threads at the toe, one with gold, one with none, and none of them matching any of the others canadianviagras.com! What else could it be but a conspiracy?